Don't have children unless you are ready to marry

[Super Nova]

I have to say I agree with this. If you cannot commit to a life together how the f..k should you commit to having children.

Don't have children unless you are ready to marry, says judge

Couples whose relationship is not stable should think before having a family, claims judge

By John Bingham, Social Affairs Editor

11:05PM GMT 08 Dec 2013
Couples should not have children if their relationship is not stable enough to merit getting married, a senior High Court judge said.

Sir Paul Coleridge said those couples whose relationship was stable enough to cope with the rigours of child rearing should marry.

But the judge, who is retiring from the bench next year after decades as a family lawyer and judge, said those who did not feel ready for children should not have them.

He said couples had no right to have children, “you only have responsibilities if you have them”.

Sir Paul criticised warring parents’ obsessions with their own “rights” instead of their responsibilities to do the best for their children.

His comments came after his Marriage Foundation think-tank published research suggesting children whose parents were not married were twice as likely to suffer a family break-up as those whose parents were married.

The Office for National Statistics reported earlier this year that the proportion of children born to unmarried mothers in England and Wales reached a record 47.5 per cent last year.

This means that as many as 346,595 babies were born outside marriage or civil partnerships in England and Wales.

It has risen from 25 per cent in 1988. If the trend continues it is estimated that more than half of all children will be born out of wedlock by 2016.

The 2011 Census found that the number of married people in England and Wales had fallen from just over half the population a decade ago to 45 per cent. This is the first time since the first census in 1801 that married couples have been in the minority.

Sir Paul, who sits in the High Court as Mr Justice Coleridge, said there was a “high level of ignorance” in the political establishment about the benefits of marriage. He praised Iain Duncan Smith, the Work and Pensions Secretary, who has pressed for tax breaks for married couples, as one of the few figures willing to advocate the virtues of marriage. Sir Paul said recently that his decision to step down next year was at least in part driven by the lack of support within the judiciary for his views.

He said he did not think politicians and other authority figures were “afraid” to speak in favour of marriage but many of them believed marriage and cohabitation were equivalent.

“There is this idea out there that it doesn’t make any difference whether you cohabit or marry [to which I say] no it doesn’t — except that one tends to last and the other tends not to last,” he said. “And when you are considering what is best for children, stability is the name of the game.”

He insisted that he was not intending to “preach morality”.

“But the reality of the family is very simple,” he said. “If your relationship is stable enough to cope with the rigours of child rearing then you should consider seriously adding the protection of marriage to your relationship.

“If your relationship is not stable enough to cope with children you should not have them. You have a responsibility – you have no right to have children, you only have responsibilities if you have them.

“In the courts people talk about their rights – you have no right where children are concerned … what you have are responsibilities and duties to do the best you can for them.”

He made clear he was not saying people should not have children unless they were prepared to marry.

He said: “I don’t think they should have children until they are sure that their relationship is stable enough to cope with the stresses and strains.”

Christian Guy, director of the Centre for Social Justice, said: “A lot of people don’t realise that long-term cohabitation with children is really rare – most people with children who are still together after many years are married.

“Long-term results show that there is something different about being married, it is more stable. People are bound together when they are married in a way that they are not if they are just living together.”
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/ ... judge.html

[AiA in Atlanta]

These days it seems the people who have kids are the ones who would do society a favour by not having any at all ...

[Rorschach]

Yep, a no brainer.

[The_Sons_of_Onan]

UPDATE 1


Judge Sir Paul Coleridge disciplined for stating views on traditional marriage

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/politic ... riage.html



UPDATE 2


Judge Sir Paul Coleridge quit because of lack of ‘support’ over marriage stance

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/ ... tance.html[/size]

[Outlaw Yogi]

I thought only gays wanted to get married.

Hmmm, then again an associate lives near a wedding boutique, and all the girls who go in there are obese.

[The_Sons_of_Onan]

I thought only gays wanted to get married.

Most DON'T - yours truly, INCLUDED
This doesn't mean we don't support the rights of those that DO

[Neferti]

The subject was about couples producing offspring via sexual intercourse without getting married first. This is feasible. A couple of Homosexual blokes producing anything other than a pain in the arse or throat cancer is an entirely different kettle of fish. At least a Lesbian couple can have intervention for one of them to get pregnant. Married or otherwise.

[Black Orchid]

Marriage is not necessarily a recipe for a long and happy partnership.

[Neferti]

Marriage is not necessarily a recipe for a long and happy partnership.

Exactly. Actually, a long and happy relationship can be ruined by marriage! However, some people still hold traditional ideas about the wedding ring BEFORE the offspring.

[Black Orchid]

Relationships take work. Continued hard work. Often when couples get a marriage certificate they seem to stop trying. Do they think a piece of paper is the glue that holds their relationship together so they stop trying?

People change and they either grow and work together or they part and many marriages that endure many years don't do so necessarily because of their love for each other. Abusive marriages often endure because one partner is simply too afraid to leave.

There is never a 'right' time to have kids. I don't think anyone is ever really ready you just do it or you don't.

Not talking about single mums who spit them out like chips. That's a different story.